Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Day 8: Willpower, Beauty and Weird Dreams


Today marks day eight of my juice fast. For a second there I thought it was day seven still. That was close. After surviving a verbal bombing on day two, day three became just as strenuous when a argument with a family member made me want to eat a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and snuggle in for a good nap. Instead, I skipped the ice cream and enjoyed a long nap until the cravings subsided.

When my friend told me the first three days were the worst she was completely right. And by “worst” I mean uncomfortable. I wasn’t in excruciating pain or weeping due to hunger. I was simply feeling uncomfortable.

On the morning of day four, I woke up with more energy than I’d had in weeks, and met a friend at the local high school track to do some running. I surprised myself when I ran further for longer (without breaking to walk) than I have since high school. Whether it was the psychological triumph of concurring day three, or the clean energy by body got from the juice I had been consuming for the last four days, whatever it was: the energy and increased endurance felt wonderful.

From day four to day eight, I’ve found that the juice for breakfast has been a phenomenal way to start the day. I never realized how dehydrated my body can become after simply sleeping for 10 hours and not being awake to drink water. The juice in the morning feels like an instant jump-start and is so refreshing to my thirsty muscles and mind. My cravings for solid food have been their strongest between 3 and 5pm, but today was a different story.

Today I’m irritable. The end of this fast is so close I can taste it. Mentally, I feel strong as a bull, but I’m dying for Indian food. Watching the Food Network seemed to pacify my hunger at first, (if I can’t taste it, I might as well look at it) but I believe my strategy has backfired.

On days five and six, I stuck to my guns through an entire baseball game and a full day at the beach. At the game, I was literally surrounded by family members biting into succulent steaming hot dogs smothered with toppings, paper bins filled with salty French fries, and waffle cones towering with Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. But I did not break. The following day was dotted with people snacking on stinky cheeses and apple slices, thick grilled hamburgers, and Oreo cookies. The lovely scent of fried clams wafted from the beach side seafood shacks. It was tough, but I didn’t cheat: not once.

I’ve lost a total of ten pounds, and I keep getting compliments that my skin and eyes look clearer. On day five I was able to do a substantial amount of weight lifting at the gym with plenty of energy to spare. I’m still having very strange dreams, most of them involving food. The night before the baseball game I went to sleep stressed about whether or not my resolve would slip. I dreamt that I was at the Yankee Candle flagship store, hiding in a corner eating trays upon trays of Rice Krispie treats covered in chocolate frosting. Today I took a nap and dreamt that I made vanilla ice cream bars covered in shredded cheese and bacon crumbles. Strangely enough, these dreams seem to leave me feeling more steady in my goal than ever.

My little juice tip of the day: feeling irritated and hungry? Half a lemon adds an amazing zing to any juice mixture. Mine was the juice of two apples, a pear, a cucumber, and half a lemon. It was perfect pick-me-up on a hot afternoon.

Also a tip for those of you just getting started: the more juice the better. Don’t feel like your breaking the rules if you juice more than three or four times a day. If your body is asking for nutrients, answer the call. Remember, your getting raw nutrients in liquid form that absorbs very easily into the body. Nothing bad is happening here. You are doing your body a huge favor and it is screaming “Thank you!!” Don’t let that little diet-voice in your head make you feel guilty for anything. You know which one I’m talking about. Even if you fast for only three days, it’s a huge accomplishment, so celebrate what you can do!

The one thing about doing this fast that I didn’t quite foresee was my recent change in mindset regarding fitness and health. I always tended to regard fitness as something women did to conform, to look hot, and make other people happy. I have come to a new realization that having a healthy body is more important for me to do for my self and my future, instead of simply what I look like in the moment. Someday, this body might save a life or carry a baby and if this body isn’t in good working condition these things, or my life, could result in disaster.

With all this lack of eating, I’ve had a lot of time to observe people. I’ve noticed that although our society places so much importance on women being proportional, skinny, perfect, and pleasing to the eye, we fail to point out that with millions of different people in this world, each person comes in a different shape and size. Many different cultures present many different ideals of beauty, and outer beauty does not always equate to receiving the love and acceptance of others. Besides, when was the last time some else’s approval protected you from the common cold or cured a stiff knee?

Some of the thinnest, most beautiful women are revered as perfect, while the inner workings of their body are crumbling due to bad overall health. Many women, including ones in my own family, have placed so much emphasis on their outward physical appearance that they forget that a thin waist and a perfect haircut are not what makes a marriage work or maintains friendships. Endlessly counting calories and reprimanding everyone at the dinner table for consuming simple carbohydrates detracts from the enjoyment created by the centuries old concept of the dinner gathering.

The gathering of people around food is not what has made this country obese, ill, and depressed. It is the seemingly ceaseless shoveling of fatty, salty, sugary foods that impacts our bodies, and while all that shoveling is happening, no one is speaking to one another. In most countries when family or friends gather for a meal, there is much more talking than eating because while nourishment of the body is very important, the nourishment of the mind and soul are even more so.

I’m not saying that I’m never again going to enjoy a basket of fried clam strips at the beach with my cousins. I’m saying that while my taste buds are enjoying the flavor explosion of crispy fried fresh clams and my nose soaks in the scent of the sea, my ears and eyes will be focused on my family. My mind and my voice are dedicated to the conversation, because just like repeatedly working a muscle will strengthen it, our interpersonal relationships are only made stronger when we maintain them by visiting, listening, and taking an active roll in the lives of those we love.

When relationships atrophy, outer beauty solves nothing.

Yes, maybe I will live out the rest of my life with a round Polish butt, thick Welsh calves, a square jaw like my father, and a small bust like my mother. They will probably prevent me from being a runway model. But none of these things can prevent me from learning, teaching, loving or being loved, nurturing, laughing, or creating. These traits are not things to be hidden or to be ashamed of, but they are things that make me Krysta.

And for those of you reading this, I’m sure you have parts of your body that you are not particularly fond of, but I would much rather get to know your mind, your spirit, and your passions than memorize your faults. Those who choose to remind you of your faults are only plagued by their own, and are not worth your time.

Please take care of the body God gave you not because your mother said so, or your boyfriend won’t sleep with you, or the Victoria’s Secret models intimidate you. Take care of your body because it’s the only one you get. You were placed on this earth for a purpose, whether or not you know what it is yet. Your body is the only vehicle you have to navigate these wonderful years, so be good to it. Don’t starve it. Don’t make it feel guilty for enjoying tasty foods and physical pleasure. Don’t overload it with chemicals and cholesterol to the point where it forgets how to function. You were given legs and arms and eyes to explore this world and move among the elements and your fellow man, so use it to the fullest. Let those taste buds tingle and pleasure receptors fire. Let your blood and tissues rejoice when flooded with nutrients. You have all the tools you need and your body will speak if you listen. You have more willpower than you think you do.

Your existence is a miracle in itself. If you ever doubt this, call your parents and they will remind you. Do your miracle justice and live a selfishly healthy life, honoring your thighs, and your bloodstream, your vocal chords and everything in between. You deserve it.

Suddenly, day eight doesn’t seem so bad. Day nine: bring it on.

1 comment:

  1. you're blog inspired me, Krysta.....bought my first juicer yesterday :)

    ReplyDelete